Last night’s episode of 24 was not that bad for a change.  That doesn’t mean DV and I aren’t going to make fun of it. Here’s our take on the latest 24 twist…

DV (12:51:06 PM): Did you see 24?
John S (12:53:10 PM): yes I did
John S (12:53:23 PM): it looked promising until the last 10 seconds
DV (12:53:45 PM): I have to admit there were times where it was interesting and fun but for the most part I kept shaking my head.
DV (12:54:05 PM): and the last 10 seconds actually made me feel better
John S (12:54:12 PM): really?
DV (12:54:16 PM): here is why
DV (12:54:28 PM): the Dana Walsh story was ridiculous… completely retarded
DV (12:55:03 PM): if there wasn’t a bigger picture behind it or a tie in to the main plot… it would have been one of the worst examples of writing ever.
DV (12:55:17 PM): before it was complete dog crap
DV (12:55:25 PM): now it’s just mostly dog crap.
DV (12:55:49 PM): I mean… there you go. She’s the mole
DV (12:56:58 PM): Before that the whole side story reminded me of Season 2— With the girl next door and the cougar.
John S (12:57:28 PM): I hear what you’re saying…but her being a mole just doesn’t make any sense
DV (12:57:36 PM): really?
John S (12:57:37 PM): how did all her previous actions relate to her being a mole?
DV (12:57:40 PM): I think it makes perfect sense
DV (12:58:33 PM): it makes sense in terms of… if she was a previous criminal… you have to think it cannot be that easy to change your identify and get hired by a government organization…
DV (12:58:43 PM): then there’s got to be someone helping you do that.
DV (12:59:33 PM): it eases the stupidity of her getting that job
DV (12:59:48 PM): too bad they killed Milton.
DV (1:00:22 PM): what a pussy though. How did he get over powered by her?
John S (1:00:41 PM): she took him by surprise
John S (1:01:17 PM): When she stuffed him in the vent, I was like what is she retarded!?…but once she revealed she was a mole than it made more sense
DV (1:01:30 PM): yeah
DV (1:02:43 PM): at one point this season I said, Fake Leo, Fake Leo’s buddy or she is a spy.
DV (1:02:51 PM): just something wasn’t right about the whole story
DV (1:03:10 PM): but I didn’t really push the issue because the inclusion of the story just angered me.
John S (1:03:56 PM): yeah. I guess make some good points. The storyline isn’t quite as retarded as it previously was
John S (12:54:01 PM): The shootout was a pretty awesome scene
DV (1:04:33 PM): you are right. The gun fight was pretty good.
DV (1:04:55 PM): except for the two dudes running out into the open
John S (1:05:03 PM): The scene was like Grand Theft Auto meets Gears of War
DV (1:05:16 PM): yes it was!
John S (1:05:20 PM): Agent Owen tried to revive the guy but instead got picked off by a Torque Bow
DV (1:21:51 PM): They should have Torque bows in 24 that would be awesome
John S (1:21:51 PM): that torque bow always gets me
DV (1:22:07 PM): it’s the most terrifying sound in Gears of War
John S (1:22:12 PM): yeah it is
DV (1:22:20 PM): if you hear it you’re already dead
DV (1:05:31 PM): that’s happened to me so many times in Gears
DV (1:05:42 PM): granted I try to do that stuff in gears because I won’t actually die.
DV (1:05:52 PM): I can restart from the check point
John S (1:06:25 PM): you knew Owen was gonna get killed from the second he first showed up on screen
John S (1:06:31 PM): it was just a matter of time
DV (1:06:38 PM): yeah, it’s like the Red Shirt guys in Star Trek.
John S (1:06:43 PM): exactly
John S (1:07:23 PM): one other criticism
John S (1:07:46 PM): how many times can Jack Bauer’s life be saved by someone shooting the terrorist in the back right before Jack is about to get killed?
DV (1:08:01 PM): yeah
DV (1:08:48 PM): how the hell did Renee get over there?
DV (1:09:15 PM): she was in Chelsea
DV (1:09:22 PM): they closed down the bridges and tunnels
John S (1:10:43 PM): that’s right!
John S (1:10:49 PM): well maybe she had clearance to go over the bridge
DV (1:10:56 PM): Bullshit.
DV (1:11:19 PM): she’s not an agent and CTU was down
John S (1:11:20 PM): even if she could get over the bridge… no way she gets from Chelsea to Queens in like 15 minutes
DV (1:11:26 PM): exactly
DV (1:11:28 PM): no friggin way
DV (1:12:26 PM): btw… what part of the car did they pull that paneling off of?
John S (1:13:05 PM): I don’t know. It was so flat
DV (1:13:16 PM): and bigger than any panel on that car
DV (1:13:24 PM): which seemed to not be missing paneling
John S (1:13:36 PM): I guess it was off the back somewhere
DV (1:13:45 PM): I call Bullshit again!
DV (1:14:09 PM): it’s like in a video game where they just simply render something and don’t complete the animation.
John S (1:15:46 PM): yeah they should have made it look like the back of the trunk or something
DV (2:14:37 PM): oh yeah this is another thing… I’m pretty sure if you fire an EMP and if you fry mother boards …
DV (2:14:46 PM): for the most part you cannot turn things back on
DV (2:15:25 PM): if hardware is broken… it’s broken.
DV (2:15:53 PM): Chloe’s plan sounded like Star Trek nonsense to me
DV (2:16:07 PM): you can pull that crap in Star Trek because no one understands how anything works
DV (2:16:12 PM): you can’t pull that crap here.
John S (2:16:42 PM): you’re probably right
DV (2:16:52 PM): Yeah it’s understood in Star Trek and accepted.
DV (2:17:14 PM): “The inertial dampers are down”
DV (2:17:21 PM): “reroute emergency power!”
DV (2:17:35 PM): who’s going to question that?
John S (2:17:43 PM): that’s true
DV (2:18:14 PM): Here Chloe took a few— what looked like clips from a battery tester and connected them to some glowing thing
DV (2:18:27 PM): and everything turned back on despite the fact a lot of hardware was fried out.
John S (2:18:59 PM): yeah. It seemed too easy
John S (2:19:10 PM): who knows…maybe it’s possible. I’m no expert
DV (2:19:24 PM): It’s crap
DV (2:19:30 PM): you cannot do that.
John S (2:19:54 PM): probably not
John S (2:19:29 PM): I think it would have made things more interesting if CTU was down the rest of the season
DV (2:19:59 PM): yeah I agree
DV (3:55:14 PM): oh another random 24 thing though. Last night the Mrs. V fell asleep during the gun fight. It bored her… And she likes action movies.
DV (3:55:18 PM): what does that tell you?
John S (3:57:49 PM): that women fall asleep in front of everything?
DV (3:57:58 PM): good point
DV (3:58:52 PM): actually back to 24 … but not really
DV (3:58:58 PM): so they cast Capt America
DV (3:59:24 PM): Chris Evans is going to be Capt. America
John S (3:59:32 PM): who is Chris Evans?
DV (3:59:42 PM): Glad you asked…
DV (3:59:44 PM): so that’s the dude who played Johnny Flame in the Fantastic 4…
DV (3:59:59 PM): …which is stupid because now he plays two marvel characters
DV (4:00:07 PM): so I was thinking they need someone older like Brad Pitt
DV (4:00:15 PM): but he’d be like 50 million dollars.
DV (4:00:24 PM): then Frank Wheeler suggested Kiefer Sutherland… and to that I said…
DV (4:00:53 PM): why the Fuck not!?
DV (4:01:22 PM): he already plays Capt. America on 24. We’re just going to give him a shield and a crappy suit with a star on it.
John S (4:01:51 PM): plus Jack Bauer was probably around during WWII
DV (4:01:58 PM): haha you’re right
DV (4:02:39 PM): and considering that he can get stabbed in the stomach, shot in the chest (ok he had a vest on) and still can fight terrorists he must have some sort of super solider serum in him.
John S (4:02:55 PM): that’s true. How else could you explain it?
DV (4:03:00 PM): HGH.
John S (4:03:07 PM): could be HGH
John S (4:03:14 PM): I don’t think it would take effect that quickly though
DV (4:03:37 PM): you should title this… Jack Bauer Tested Postive for HGH, Suspended for 3 hours.
John S (4:03:49 PM): hahaha that’s good but I was thinking this: Season 8 improves, but still pretty crappy
DV (4:05:21 PM): I agree with that
DV (4:05:41 PM): It’s like drinking Coors Light
DV (4:06:10 PM): it sucks ass but after a 16 cans (or in this case episodes) you’re drunk.
John S (4:06:23 PM): and by that point you’ll drink just about anything
DV (4:07:09 PM): yeah then after you drink another 10 you vomit

15 minutes later…

John S (4:30:51 PM): btw… I’m editing this right now. We sound like massive dorks here
John S (4:31:01 PM): we talk about Star Trek, Captain America, Fantastic Four and Gears of War
DV (4:32:16 PM): yeah you’re right… I can’t believe we talked about the Fantastic Four
DV (4:32:28 PM): that’s almost as bad as talking about twenty-four