If you’re a fan of the CBS show How I Met Your Mother, then you know that Barney Stinson, who is famous for his womanizing on the sitcom, has an abundance of social theories, most of which revolve around getting laid.

One of these theories is “The Mermaid Theory.” According to Barney, The Mermaid Theory is based off the legend that hundreds of years ago, sailors who were at sea for long periods of time would be so desperate for female companionship that they would see manatees in the water as beautiful mermaids.

In modern day terms, Stinson describes the mermaid theory as so:

Every woman, no matter how initially unattractive, has a clock that represents the time it takes for a man to realize he wants to “bone her.” Typically the woman in question is someone close to you that you see on a regular basis. Perhaps it’s a co-worker, a friend or a neighbor. Upon your initial meeting, you won’t find this woman attractive at all, but over time, slowly but surely, you will want to have sex with her.

So is Barney right about the Mermaid Theory? To a certain extent he is. (more…)

This is a guest post from Pokerjunkie.com

Learning how to win money at poker is often the easy part; the hard part is getting time away from your wife or girlfriend to play. While a few women play alongside their boyfriends or husbands at the poker tables, it’s a rare thing indeed, with the time spent playing poker usually a sore point and source of arguments in many relationships. There’s no perfect solution to the problem but there are definitely some tactics that can help you get in more time playing poker and less time arguing about how often you play. (more…)

When you first met your girl she had an amazing body. She was thin, shapely and irresistible. Just the thought of her naked made your dick go from six-to-twelve. You knew she was a keeper so you gave up on the single life and decided to lock her up long term.

But now after dating her for a long time she’s begun to grow comfortable with you…a little too comfortable. She no longer feels the need to look good because she thinks you love her unconditionally and that it doesn’t matter what she looks like. The MMA Workout Program DVD you bought, in hopes of getting her to use it, is collecting dust and she spends most nights sitting like a lump on the couch, sucking down Haagen-Dazs and watching reality television. This has caught up to her over time and that once sexy body of hers has now become a shell of its former self, equipped with a muffin top, sloppy breasts and cottage cheese ass. Now the thought of her naked makes your dick shrivel like a frightened turtle.

What is a man to do?

We all know that no matter how much you like a girl’s personality, there still has to be some level of physical attraction. You could go the easy route and just dump her, but if you do kind of like this girl or if breaking up isn’t a viable option (i.e. you’re already married or have kids) and want to give it a chance to work, there are a few things you can do to get her back in shape.

We also know that you have to be very careful when addressing the subject of weight gain with your woman. You can’t just tell her straight out she is a fatty. You have to tread the subject carefully.

In this article, I have outlined a number of ways to get your girl back in shape without ever having to be brutally honest like Abe Lincoln in that GEICO commercial.

Unfortunately if you are serious about getting your girl to lose weight, it’s going to involve some sacrifices. Many of the items on this list will take some hard work and dedication on your part, but if executed properly, you will both benefit from it.
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Since the beginning of time, men have used the hotness scale to rate how attractive a woman is when debating amongst friends. Using the standard 1- 10 ranking (with one being the ugliest woman imaginable and ten being a perfect woman), men have found an efficient way to judge women in the shallowest way possible.

However, over the years, the Hotness Scale has gotten too lenient. This is probably because each level has never been truly defined. We need to make a clear-cut definition of what each number means so that we can accurately judge women solely on their looks, while completely ignoring their personality.

The majority of men will brag they’ve been fortunate enough to get with at least one nine or ten in their lifetime but that is highly unlikely. Most women we meet and hook-up with will fall somewhere in the 4-6 range.

I’ve been with some fairly attractive women in my day but I doubt any of them can be considered higher than a seven. Even my wife probably falls within the 6-7 range. Knowing her, she would probably take offense that I only consider her a seven on a good day but as you’ll see with my rankings, seven is very good.

Here are the rankings defined… (more…)

I remember back in the day when I was in high school and college, the one thing that dominated my thoughts more than anything was girls.  More specifically: sex.

At that age, like many guys, I was obsessed with hooking up with girls.

The experience of hooking up with a girl was both exhilarating and nerve-wracking.  It was exhilarating because these experiences were so new and awesome. Squeezing on a pair of firm tits or getting head for the first time are two of my fondest memories.

Yet it was also nerve-wracking because I didn’t have a slightest idea what I was doing.   Kissing girls, playing with tits and going down on a girl are all activities I had to learn the hard way.  Like most young men who are just beginning to experience sex, I was clueless. I slobbered over lips, groped at titties and struggled to find the clitoris.  I figured things out eventually but there were some growing pains along the way.   If only I had a teacher or perhaps an instructional video that could have corrected my mistakes!  THEN maybe I could have seen more success.

Well I wasn’t so lucky to be privy to this information but maybe YOU can.  I got my hands on a copy of How Players Do It, an instructional video from H-Spot.com.   This video breaks down everything you need to know to become a stud in the bedroom.  It covers all aspects of sex from kissing, to oral sex, to even titty fucking. (more…)

This post is part of the “ Links of the Month”  Segment for February 2011.

According to H-Spot.com, a sex education web site, there are 14 sex mistakes that men make.  It’s a pretty solid list and admittedly, I’ve been guilty of a few, not because of ignorance, but because of laziness.   For example, the first mistake men make is asking to have sex…

“Asking to have sex is like asking your mother if you can have a girl over your own apartment. When you ask, you immediately show a lack of confidence and control – two essential alpha characteristics that deep-down, all women crave. Solution: Work up the physical escalation ladder by starting out with basic touching and kissing. She will respectfully stop you if she doesn’t want sex.”

This is probably true if you’re single and trying to bang some girl you just met.  However, if you’re in a long-term committed relationship, I don’t think this rule applies.   Who wants go through all the effort of trying to get laid when you get married?  I know I don’t.  Easy sex is supposed to be one of advantages of marriage.

Other noteworthy links… (more…)

Having a hard time getting laid in college?  You might have better luck in the future.

A California University of Pennsylvania student has plans to start a web site where students can find other coeds who are looking for sexual partners.

The site, which is scheduled to launch in March 2011, is called RUD2F.com—which for you acronym-challenged people stands for Are You Down to Fuck?  The site’s slogan is “Safer than Craig’s List and Cheaper than Bars.”

Sounds like a cool idea in theory (although if you can’t get laid in college the old-fashioned way, then you might as well just give up).   Yet I have a feeling it might not work that well.  We all know that most women can get sex whenever they please—especially in college.  All a moderately-attractive college girl needs to do to meet a guy is to wear something sexy at the bar and wait for a guy to approach her.  Men are the ones that have the challenge. My guess is this site will be filled with a bunch of horny, desperate males and slutty, fat chicks. At least they should benefit from it. (more…)

The MLB League Championship Series begins tonight, and as a big baseball fan, that has me pretty excited—But these pictures of girls representing the remaining playoff teams might have me more excited.

While the Yankees, Rangers, Phillies and Giants will battle it out on the field for their respective pennants, here at Living with Balls, we’ll pick our winners based on which girl is hotter.  Check out the pictures after the jump and be sure to vote.

WARNING: These pictures are probably NOT SAFE FOR WORK (more…)